Why I Write about Grief

Posted on by Bree Dawn

Less than a month before I graduated high school, my friend went missing for five, agonizing days. On the fifth day—only minutes after my mother and I landed in Portland for my Twilight-themed senior trip—I opened Facebook and saw his aunt’s update.

His body had been found, but his soul was gone.

From that moment on, my life fractured into Before and After. 

I’m not the only girl with a story like this. However, in that season of grief, I felt more alone than I ever thought possible. Everyone I knew was going through some variation of the same grief, but that knowledge offered no comfort. 

According to Goodreads, I read twenty-one books that year. 

I can’t tell you when I read any of those books, not even my self-proclaimed favorite novel, Challenger Deep. If I could remember, I might be able to say that Neal Shusterman’s words saved me or reminded me that I was never alone.

In reality, I don’t remember reading anything during the months that followed. All I remember is scribbling letters and poetry to my friend with tears in my eyes because I didn’t know how to let him go.

Flash forward four years. I was in college, working part-time as a writing tutor, and in my first real relationship. Life was good.

One night, I pulled You’ve Reached Sam by Dustin Thao off my bookshelf and started reading. I had no idea that such a simple action would end up healing my inner teenage self.

Reading You’ve Reached Sam made me realize that writing about grief has power. I’d read other books about loss, but none of them made me sob during chapter one.

None of them made me feel like someone else saw the grief I still carried years later.

You might be wondering why any of this matters. You clicked on this page to learn why I write about grief, not to hear my life story.

But, if I hadn’t lost my friend in high school, I don’t think it ever would’ve crossed my mind to write about this kind of heartache. If I hadn’t found You’ve Reached Sam, I don’t know if I ever would’ve realized the impact that grief stories have on people.

So, I write about grief because I wish I’d had a You’ve Reached Sam when I met grief for the first time. 

I write about grief because I wish I’d had an author say that my darkness wouldn’t last forever.

I write about grief so that you have someone to sit with you until the dawn finally breaks.

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Published by Bree Dawn

Bree Dawn is a voracious book dragon who believes in the power of stories. As a young girl, she consumed as many stories as her small hands could hold. Now, she uses grief and loss to remind young adults that they are never alone in their darkness. When she’s not planting seeds of light in her own work, you can find Bree reading the latest YA novel she picked up on a whim or listening to Taylor Swift in her hometown where she lives with her cat, Angel.

6 thoughts on “Why I Write about Grief”

  1. First of all, I want to say thank you for sharing your story and writing about your reasons why you write about grief. I think it is such a powerful reason, and one I can relate to a lot. I often touch on death in some form in many of my own projects because of a similar experience. My father had suddenly and unexpectedly passed away from a stroke in the first half of my senior year of high school. My life after dramatically changed as I’m sure you can relate to. For a time, I had decided to quit writing until it became the source for me to unburden my thoughts and emotions. So, yes, all that to say is that I’m so sorry you had to go through such a thing, but I think your reasoning for writing about grief is so strong and I hope your stories are able to impact others one day like You’ve Reached Same impacted you. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Wow, this is so good. I love that grief has motivated you to help other people grieving. What a beautiful way to use your gift!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Thank you, sweet friend. 🤍 It’s not always easy writing about grief, but it’s been so rewarding to see how my words and experiences have touched and resonated with others.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh Issabelle, I’m so sorry for your loss. 🖤 Losing your father at such a young age is heartbreaking, and my heart goes out to you.

    God works all things for His glory, so if I’m able to use my pain and grief to touch others, then that’s something I want to do, even if it’s hard. 🫶

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  6. […] I’m not usually an advocate for buying multiple editions of a book. I’ve always been a one-and-done kind of girl because books take up space, and I’ve just never seen the point in owning multiple copies. But, with this one, it’s different. I’ll probably buy every edition that Dustin Thao releases because it’s the book that unknowingly changed everything for me (click here to read why). […]

    Liked by 1 person

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